“Dummy Pirates” is a team deathmatch game featuring 3 vs 3 ship battles, and to be honest, it’s incredibly dull. While many incomplete games on Steam sport the early access label, “Dummy Pirates” seems to have launched prematurely, even by those standards. It gives off the impression that either its development time was too short, there were extended gaps in its progress, or its development team focused solely on graphics.

While not visually extraordinary or anything of the sort, the game does offer a colourful experience with distinct ship designs representing their supposed traits. There are some visually appealing wind trails when the ships move, and the projectiles look decent. The levels also showcase vibrant visuals.

I must confess that at this point, I’m struggling to find positive aspects about this game. It completely lacks any animation effects, apart from those mentioned earlier. The projectiles lack any firing or impact animations, simply appearing and disappearing upon collision. The wind animation is static, abruptly starting and stopping rather than transitioning smoothly. 

The sound design is equally disappointing, with the icy projectile resembling the grating sound of a thousand nails on a chalkboard, amplified through a megaphone. Moreover, the wind audio is binary, either fully on or completely off. There are no other sounds…

From a gameplay perspective, it gets even worse. The ships feel oddly floaty, abruptly coming to a halt, and a limited fire arc. There’s a glaring lack of imagination on display here, with no elements that involve controlling ships amidst winds and ocean currents or employing clever tactics to outmanoeuvre enemies before firing a broadside. Instead, we’re left with a subpar shooter where human characters have been replaced by unremarkable ships.

The enemies are particularly frustrating, as they include not only other ships but also inexplicable monsters. I have no idea what purpose these creatures serve other than loot. The enemy ship AI is lacking making killing them boring. Finally, the lack of feedback from firing and being fired upon really dulls any momentum the gameplay had.

Numerous flaws in this game prevent me from recommending it. While it may improve with time, early access games rarely undergo significant functional changes, which is precisely what this game needs.

Pros	Cons
Colourful ships	No special effects
Pretty world	Annoying sound
A ship based game	Might as well be an onfoot shooter

Final Score: 3/10